Time

What time is there that we all think we have?. It's a really simple answer, but in some ways it's a really complicated answer that one would say has shades of gray in it. I'm seeing my time here being spent wisely one day and just wasted another. I'm getting older, I'm becoming more each day that man that I'm (I thought suppose to be exposed years ago) to become. I have figured that with my time now I'm looking towards a future that's far away but not so far away. I'm wanting to plan, prepare, act. But, where to start?!; I'm one of those procrastinators who thrive off stressful situations, My weekends are my time of what I call a vacation because I literally *try* to push my life that I live here in King away, My time with Lauren is come to a point that I'm seeing it more and more precious and the memories are becoming more and more and I feel like leaving there is the end of my vacation, my time has ran out. Clock back into reality. Change shapes and mentality back to this ball of frustration and stress due to the way things are here.
Want to really know something that's totally off the deep end?..Each weekend though..I'm geeking that I'm actually spilling this. I'm loving the fact that come Sunday mornings I actually look forward to church. I've gotten to where I've even subscribed to the podcast on my iTunes so when the days worn on me through the weeekday. I've got the great pastor of Pine Ridge Church, Tadd Grandstaff to speak out and just bring me back down and throw something worth thinking about into my mind and just..give me that reality check.
I know if those of you that have read my blogs in the long past time ago and actually know me and know of my past and whatnot would know that Mr. Matthew here would NOT be one to geek out over a church, ever..but, here I am. Spilling mad beans. lol.
I think though that the time I'm spending here at my place is winding down. I'm not seeing this place like I did 4 years ago when I first moved in. I was 21, weekend warrior, looked no further than what society allowed me to look, judgmental, socially deviated, basically that which you would love to talk to but knew enough to understand but not enough to know that I actually needed a bit more help than I was getting. Back on track though, I'm starting to understand that I'm coming to a point where I'm going to have ...not try or hopefully or whatever...have to make a sacrifice. Yep, Sacrifice a lot to get on with my life and push further into another chapter and make a new life outside of the Northwestern half of NC and move wherever God tells me to. Giving citation to Genesis 12:1 The LORD had said to Abram, "Leave your country, your people and your father's household and go to the land I will show you." My time to just jump forward is coming close and I just need to put my ear up to the sky and listen with a open heart and mind and let loose.
Heh, I think it's about that time. I'm getting a bit old when I say at 10:30 i'm tired. Guess Mick Jagger was wrong. Time is not on my side. hahahaha.. and there is my spill into music for the night.
Ok, folks. I'm out. Have a great week ahead and ...yeah make some time for yourself. Who knows when you'll be out of it.